A Suggestion for Parents
Hi wonderful parents,
I spent some time this past weekend watching two RC DVDs: How Parents Can Counsel Their Children and Counseling the Very Young. They are RC treasures. I recommend that you watch them when you can.
In the first one, Tim Jackins explains the basics of RC family work, probably to some Co-Counselors who know very little about it. There is something so fresh about his thinking. After Tim talks for a half hour, he answers many questions for more than another hour. The questions and answers are rich and illuminating and address a lot of confusions adults in our society have about young people, as well as the difficulties that parents commonly run into. I myself deepened my understanding from hearing his explanations.
I showed the first thirty minutes of this DVD to my RC class, which includes young people and young adults who grew up in family work. They found the talk fascinating, and I think they felt reassured by Tim’s long-term commitment to figuring out how to use RC with young people. One young adult who is new to RC cried because she was so amazed that something like this existed for young people.
The RC booklet How Parents Can Counsel Their Children is based on this talk by Tim, but it also includes things that are not on the DVD. And the DVD includes things that are not in the booklet. I found that I enjoyed the DVD more, because I got to hear Tim’s tone and see him thinking.
The second DVD, Counseling the Very Young, is equally wonderful. It starts with about fifteen minutes of Tim counseling a baby who is about five months old while he explains what he is doing. (People have asked me about resources that explain how to listen to infants. This one is very helpful.) After counseling the baby, Tim goes on to answer questions from parents, which is also illuminating. Then in the last part of the DVD, Tim, Patty Wipfler,1 and Lenore Kenny2 answer some questions in a way that gets right to the heart of things and clears away confusions about young people (and adults, too).
These resources also give some historical perspective on RC family work and its development.
Some things can get lost as we communicate RC theory from one class or workshop to the next, many times over. And how we communicate it can change over time. On the one hand, we learn more as our experience grows, and we communicate the new understandings. On the other hand, the clarity, in this case about counseling young people, that came in the beginnings of practicing RC should not be lost. That’s why listening to Tim or Harvey Jackins, or others, as they were initially developing RC is so important.
I recommend you buy these DVDs, or get your Community to buy them. They are good for parents, but not just parents.
Somerville, Massachusetts, USA
Reprinted from the RC e-mail discussion list for leaders of parents
(Present Time 183, April 2016)
1 Patty Wipfler is the former International Liberation Reference Person for Parents.
2 Lenore Kenny is an RC leader in San Francisco, California, USA.